For you Mr. Vane

I had a very interesting last weekend in Seattle at my cousin't wedding. This weekend opened my eyes to the varying levels of humanity I've seen in the past 3 days. Here they are:

1) When was the last time you got a ride from a stranger and didn't feel uncomfortable? Patrick Vane is my hero. He arrived at my cousin's wedding arriving mid-day Sat. and left earlier-than-normal Sunday morning to give me a ride to the airport on account of my brother being a lame ass and not wanting to. Not only was it the best road trip I've ever had, but I think I've converted yet another wealthy person to indulge in coupons. I call him "wealthy" because he was rich in personality and chose to drive a Mini instead of his Porsche. I don't think I've ever sat in a car for 4 hours and not looked at my watch. So yes, today and for the rest of July, Patrick Vane has reached the quan of human decency.

2) Since when does a 50-something woman have precedence over a pregnant woman for a seat? I'm at the airport and a pregnant woman with a massive stroller and a 2 year-old on her hip walks over to this 50-something. She asks if anyone is sitting at the 4 seats she's hovering over. And the old woman says "yes." Pregnant lady with balls of steel, calls her out on it and asks "who?" And the old lady says while pointing, "Me, my husband, my mother and my son." FUCKING CUNT. So, the pregnant lady walks away, sweaty, irritated and fat looking for another seat. I couldn't help but glare at this wanna be cougar and want to punch her in the throat. Her life is almost over and this pregnant lady is not only carrying the future generation in her uterus, but she's holding an impressionable child who now has no idea what respect is. Pisses me off.

3) Ever since Lost came out, all I care about is my safety on a plane should we crash. I always ask for an emergency aisle seat. Well, this flight, I don't end up getting one. But guess who did...a dude who was missing a hand. So of course, I look at the emergency pamphlet and read through the eligibility section to see who's allowed to sit there. And guess what!? You need to have both hands and feet able and ready to perform the duties of emergency aisle sitter. Well fuck. Do you think anyone said a damn word to this dude?? Nope. I couldn't figure out why either. Would it be discrimination if the flight attendant had made him move? If so, wouldn't this discrimination be totally viable? Especially since other lives would have been in jeopardy if this dude couldn't use a second hand to get the door open? All I have to say is that the one-handed dude was lucky there wasn't an emergency. Cuz I would have trampled him to get that door opened...does that make me an asshole?


7/11/07 4:52 pm
THIS JUST IN COURTESY OF AN UNNAMED SOURCE:::

Turns out its okay to request the one hand wonder to move from his seat:

Two reasons actually:

1st - Under the constitution its okay to discriminate (read-kick a one handed wonder out of his seat) against a "protected group" (readhandicapped folks), as long as there is a RATIONAL RELATIONSHIP (Supreme court language) between the discriminatory act (Kicking the dude out) and a "greater governmental purpose" (making sure able bodied folks are sitting in the exit rows in case of an accident).

2nd - FAA (Federal Aviation Administration) regs specifically require that only able bodied individuals sit in emergency row exit seats. I know this because I worked my way through law school as a flight attendant for United oveseas routes.

THANKS FOR THIS ENLIGHTENING PIECE OF INFORMATION!! xo